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There was a lady who was cheating on her husband with a boyfriend.
One day while they were getting intimate she hears her husband pull into the driveway.
Her boyfriend says "oh no! What should we do?!" She says "hurry! Get dressed and go to the living room!" Once they're in the living room she starts sprinkling baby powder all over him.
He says "what are you doing?" She says "I'm making you white like a statue. Just stand in a pose, my husband will never know you're real, because he's stupid!" Her husband comes in and sees them and says to her "what's that?" She says "Well, me and Mrs. Johnson next door went shopping today.
She has one just like it. I liked hers so much that she took me to get one." He shrugs it off and goes about his business. That night the boyfriend is still standing in the living room still posed, too afraid to escape.
He hears the husband wake up and open the bedroom door. The husband walks past him, opens the fridge, pops open a beer and makes a bologna sandwich. He then walks up to the boyfriend and hands him the beer and sandwich and says "Here, I was next door at Mrs.Johnson's house stuck in that position for 2 days and no one gave me anything to eat."